题目
雅思大作文求高手批改
Some people say that governments should pay for the public health care and education,while others say that it is not the government's responsibility.Please discuss both views and give your own opinion.
正文：
Recent years have witness the development of our morden society,which has aroused a heated debate of whether it is the government's responsibility paying for the public health care and education.views on this issue vary from person to person.From my point of view,before airing my own opinion,I do think it is necessary to analyze this thorny issue from different angles.
part of the public those who insist that it is government's business to the public medicial care and education tend to present the following reasons.To begin with,the government's financial is mainly come from individuals' tax which should also use for the public basic aquire,such as health and education.In addition,inflation lead that the cost of life is increasingly high,which lead some people suffer from poverty and disease.If government pay no attention to this,it will cause public dissatisfaction to the authority.
however,other people may explore this issue from another angle.for one thing,it will be a huge payment if government pay for everyone's health care and education.the financial used in other area will have to be declined,such as industy,agriculture,and that will be negative for the whole country's develop.For another thing,people will lose their power fighting for a better life.Futhermore,it should not only the government's responsibility but also the whole society's acquirement to keep healthy and receive higher education.
To sum up,although it is very difficult at an absolute conclusion to this issue,it is certain that only the government and the individuals concerned join hands in solving this pressing matter can the situation be improved greatly in the near future.
Some people say that governments should pay for the public health care and education,while others say that it is not the government's responsibility.Please discuss both views and give your own opinion.
正文：
Recent years have witness the development of our morden society,which has aroused a heated debate of whether it is the government's responsibility paying for the public health care and education.views on this issue vary from person to person.From my point of view,before airing my own opinion,I do think it is necessary to analyze this thorny issue from different angles.
part of the public those who insist that it is government's business to the public medicial care and education tend to present the following reasons.To begin with,the government's financial is mainly come from individuals' tax which should also use for the public basic aquire,such as health and education.In addition,inflation lead that the cost of life is increasingly high,which lead some people suffer from poverty and disease.If government pay no attention to this,it will cause public dissatisfaction to the authority.
however,other people may explore this issue from another angle.for one thing,it will be a huge payment if government pay for everyone's health care and education.the financial used in other area will have to be declined,such as industy,agriculture,and that will be negative for the whole country's develop.For another thing,people will lose their power fighting for a better life.Futhermore,it should not only the government's responsibility but also the whole society's acquirement to keep healthy and receive higher education.
To sum up,although it is very difficult at an absolute conclusion to this issue,it is certain that only the government and the individuals concerned join hands in solving this pressing matter can the situation be improved greatly in the near future.
提问时间：2021-02-14
答案
have witnessed paying 改成to pay 既然From my point of view 就已经要表明我的观点了为什么又来个 在我表达观点之前呢?删除掉比较好part of the public 我不知道表达地不地道,如果你认为是有根据的话就用 但those ...
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